The Way Things Were Supposed to Be

by DecoyNeko

I can barely concentrate now that I told Vash I had gotten him something. He's probably expecting doughnuts or something, but I can just see his face when he sees what he's really getting. Ugh, I've been constantly blushing too. Well, I decided that it can't go half as bad as I'm making it out to be...who knows? Maybe it'll turn out good.

Vash has been extremely nice lately, first with the lunch and flowers, second with my room, and now he made dinner just for the two of us. Of course he made Millie and Knives dinner too, but he set ours out on the porch so it'd be romantic, I guess. I never knew Vash could cook, but amazingly he can, and do a damn good job of it as well.

The meal was simple yet elegant, and he knew that I enjoyed dessert the most so he made it the biggest part of the meal. I was really impressed that he found out that my favorite dessert was strawberry chocolate cheesecake, but even more impressed that it was the best cheesecake I've ever tasted.

"Meryl?"

My head snaps up to see Vash's concerned eyes. "Yes?"

"Are you feeling well? You haven't really talked much during dinner," he seems really worried.

"I'm fine," I smile in return and put my hand on his, giving it a small squeeze.

"Okay," Vash grins slyly, "When do I get my surprise?"

I roll my eyes, "You're very impatient, you know?"

"Yep!" he responds and smiles broader.

I pause. Really the only reason I've been delaying sex with Vash is because I'm afraid of doing a bad job. What if I completely screw up and he leaves me...? No. Vash would never just leave, but he might break it off... I don't know what I would do if that happened...

I remember several instances with Drew, my last boyfriend...well, really only boyfriend... Just those times were enough to make me never want to have sex again...

*Flashback*

It's been a hard day for him... I just want to make him happy. I look over at him in bed, his brown hair falling around his face and almost covering his green eyes, "Drew?"

"...What?"

"Did you want to...?" he knows what I mean. I usually ask him that after he has bad days, although most times these sessions end badly...for me mostly.

"Sure..." he's always so straight to the point... I hate that.

I move cautiously over to him and at least try to kiss him, too bad he refuses to move his lips at all. It really would be a lot better if he'd at least try to make an attempt.

I sigh, "Can you at least try? We don't have to do this if you don't want to." I'm frustrated; I can't help but sound a little annoyed.

"No, I want to," he sits up halfway and kisses me. I really don't like when he kisses me anymore. His kisses don't feel soft and warm like they used to; they feel professional and stiff, like it were his duty to kiss me, not for pleasure.

'This is going absolutely nowhere...' I think, 'He's been doing this same motion for the past ten seconds...' I slide my hand down his chest and over his lower abdomen before reaching my destination. He doesn't even flinch as I grab him; in fact he does nothing...

After a few minutes of no progress he sits back and shoves me away from him, "God! You really can't do anything right, can you? Get away from me, you worthless-" He stops himself with a sigh and just stands up before throwing on some clothes.

"Drew? I'm sorry, I didn't mean t-" he slams the door before I can finish my sentence.

*End Flashback*

Well, I remember some several other cases when it just hurt, but even if I asked him to stop he wouldn't. I never cried in front of him though... I wouldn't have given him that sort of satisfaction.

Now, I know that most of you are wondering, "Why the hell did you stay with him so long if he was such an ass?" and that's a damn good question. I tend to ask myself that sometimes now, and I've found the answer. When we first began to date, Drew was such a good man. He would do things for me, buy me gifts, and treat me like I was something special, but after we got a little more serious he began to slowly go downhill... I guess I thought that if I waited around long enough the old Drew would come back.

I've wondered from time to time how he's doing, or really if he's treated any other women like he did me since then. I feel sorry for the next poor girl he tricked, but maybe she was a little smarter than me and got out while it was still pretty harmless.

I look back up at Vash and smile...I wonder if he can tell that it's fake...? "Come on, let's go clean up okay?"

Vash pauses briefly before grinning again, "Okay..."

I pick up a few dishes off of the weathered table Vash had spread a floral print table cloth over for dinner and carried them into the kitchen, setting them into the sink alongside a few stray cups that were used sometime during the day.

"Do you think you can handle the dishes?" I ask, I need to go get changed if I plan to 'give him his surprise.'

"Aw, come on! That's not fair, you're weaseling your way out of work!" Vash complains in his little whiny voice.

"Please?" I run my nails up the back of his neck and giggle at his gleeful reaction.

"Okay..." he smiles and moves his head against my hand while smiling like an idiot.

"Thanks," I kiss his cheek before hurrying off to my room to get a really quick bath and change before he finishes those dishes.

~*~

"Wow... This does look pretty good," Meryl mumbled under her breath as she looked into the fogged, full-length mirror of the bathroom. The lingerie wasn't too skimpy, but not too concealing either. She turned around to see the back of it, finding herself pleased with her appearance.

She brushed her wet hair, deciding not to dry it because 1. It'd take too long, and 2. Because it looked nice when it was wet. It looked a lot like it did when it was dry, but choppier, and she liked it that way. Meryl checked herself over one more time before deeming herself presentable and slowly unlocking the door.

She poked her head out quickly to make sure the coast was clear before darting from the bathroom to her room, which happened to be all the way down the hall. She liked her room where it was, however, and was actually relieved that it was a little farther away from everyone else's rooms. At least she could be fairly certain that no one would hear what would happen tonight. She felt the corners of her mouth perk up a little, and was relieved that she wasn't as worried anymore.

She closed the door quickly behind her and walked over to get her pack of matches she kept since she always liked to light candles in her room. She always found them relaxing, but tonight she wanted to set a mood with the candlelight. She rushed around her room lighting the many candles before blowing out the last match. "Hmm, this night may turn out better than I thought it would..." she grinned a little before clasping her hands together with a hard smack. "Now to just get his ass in here..."

She listened through the crack of her door. She could still hear movement in the kitchen so she sat down to wait for Vash to finish his chore. 'Okay, I have everything, right? Let's see... Lingerie...? Check. Candles...? Check. Treats...?' she glanced over at a small assortment of chocolates, rubbing oils, and champagne before smiling like a moron. 'Check! Protection...?...Protection!?' Meryl stopped and searched over her well set out display of items. "No... I couldn't have forgotten that," she frantically searched again and came up empty.

After looking through every single drawer in her room she came to a startling conclusion, "I forgot the most important item of the night..." She balled up her fists, "I WILL get that item. I didn't go through all of this to have everything screwed up by a package of god damned prophylactics!"

She pressed her ear to the crack of the door yet again still finding the sounds from the kitchen. "Damn it! How long does it take him to wash dishes!" she mumbled rather loudly. If there had been another door leading to the outside this wouldn't have been a problem, but, "Of course not! Only the most complicated fixes for Meryl!"

She eyed any route of escape and came to her last resort, her window. "Good thing this isn't a two story house..."

Meryl pulled on a pair of shorts and a tee shirt, quickly locking the door to prevent any entry into her room except for through the window before hopping out of it onto the sandy ground of the streets. "Drugstore... where is the drugstore...?" she asked herself before turning around to face the shop front, "Oh..." She laughed a little before walking up to the large double doors and into the small drugstore.

"May I help you?" an elderly woman from behind the counter smiled nicely at Meryl.

"Umm, yes. I need a package of condoms," she muttered the last word quietly and blushed.

"Sure, Hun," the woman reached under the counter and grabbed a small pink box, laying it out on the counter and telling Meryl the amount.

Meryl shoved her hands into her pockets to retrieve the money. "Huh?" Meryl glanced down and realized that she had completely forgotten her money in her rush. "Ugh..." she smacked her head down onto the wooden counter and heaved a huge sigh.

"Do you not have enough money?" the woman asked, bewildered by Meryl's actions.

"I left my money at home," she groaned and picked her head up a few times to bop it back down on the board.

"I'll tell you what, if you promise to bring the amount by tomorrow I'll let you take it. Will you bring the money by tomorrow?" the woman smiled down at Meryl and handed her the box.

"Yes! Oh God, you don't know how much this means to me! Thank you so much!" Meryl grabbed the woman in a tight hug before sprinting out of the store and back to her window. She jumped through the frame with haste and closed the it behind her, locking it.

"If this turns out bad I'll kill myself..." Meryl mumbled and pulled off her shorts and shirt, leaving her only in her lingerie again. Walking over to her door again she listened to find it completely silent. 'Crap, don't tell me he already went to bed...' she listened again and jumped back in surprise as a loud knock resounded through her head.

"Meryl?" she sighed in relief, it was Vash.

"Yea?"

"...Can I come in?"

"Yea, sure. Hold on," Meryl's eyes darted over to the box and she hurried over to it and tossed it into one of her drawers, she didn't want to look like too big of a pervert or something. "Okay!"

The handle jiggled, "Umm... The door's locked."

"Oh...Hold on," she rushed back over to the door and unlocked it, taking a deep breath to ready herself. "Okay..."

The door handle turned again followed by the creaking of the hinges, "I was wondering if you wa-" Meryl bit her lower lip and closed her eyes before the door was open all the way... Silence...

She cracked open one eye to see Vash completely stopped in his tracks. His eyes were wide as he scanned over her body. She blinked a few times, feeling a little awkward, "Vash?"

Nothing.

"Vash, do you like it?" she tried again, stepping a little closer to him.

Vash broke himself from his daze to answer, "Does this mean that...?"

Meryl blushed before slowly nodding. The candlelight danced across the walls of the room, radiating off of her skin as she again took a step closer, taking Vash's hand in her own and allowing him entry into her room. She then eased the door closed and locked it for privacy.

Vash still held onto her hand, feeling extremely child-like and inexperienced. It had been quite awhile since he had done anything of this sort and he was beginning to doubt his ability. He had only had sex twice his entire life as of yet and both times had been over 100 years ago, each happening before he had been so brutally scarred. Meryl would be the first woman to be with him after his appearance had been so disfigured.

'She looks so beautiful...And she did all of this for us...For me,' Vash thought, smiling. "Meryl..." he slid his free hand down the side of her hip, stopping temporarily to play with the hem of her panties.

A deep crimson blush spread over her cheeks, "Vash, I- This won't be my first time... I hope you aren't disappointed." Her words fumbled together slightly and Vash could see the evident shame in her eyes.

"No, Meryl, I'm not disappointed. That's not important to me," his smile never wavered as he hoisted her up into his arms and walked her over to the bed, setting her delicately down on the edge. Vash could feel himself start to become aroused, but he wanted to take this slow and enjoy each and every moment.

Meryl felt so lucky. She couldn't believe that she was finally with the man she loved and the feelings that coursed through her veins were reciprocated. She'd worried for so long about the probability of them ever getting together, and now that it had actually happened she felt so relieved. But now another problem was plaguing her: her insecurities.

She hadn't felt very confident about her body since the relationship with Drew had ended. She had...scars. Not many, but a few in very private places that she knew Vash would notice. Drew hadn't been a very loving person towards the end of their relationship and when they had sex he would often become very rough. He bit, he scratched, and he hit, and now Meryl bore the scars of his abusive nature. She only hoped that Vash wouldn't think any less of her.

Vash's fingers fell to the tie of her shirt behind her neck, tugging the knot undone and letting the fabric slide free. His muscles tightened a little as he got his first view of her bare chest. No, she didn't have large breasts, but they were perfect in Vash's eyes.

He admired her lovely body, running his fingers over the silk-like skin covering her collarbone and neck until he noticed something. "Meryl...? What is this?" Vash inspected the three small marks on her left breast. "Are they-?"

"Teeth marks..." Meryl's head hung low, her hair draping in front of her face.

"How? What happened?" Vash ran his fingertips over the scarred flesh causing Meryl to shiver.

"It's such a long story... I'll tell you later. I promise," she wrapped her thin fingers around his hand, holding it firmly against her heart. "Do you feel it, Vash? My heart has never pounded like that for anyone, not until you came along."

Her words sent an emotion through him that he'd never felt before. It was close to the one he felt for Rem, but this one was still...different. He loved Rem like a mother, a guide, she was his religion, but Meryl...Meryl made him feel tingly all over. She made his head feel light and like his body was simply floating. He felt so in love... It was time.

He placed his hands on either side of her face and planted his lips on hers lightly. He pulled back breathing hard, "I love you, Meryl."

Her eyes were wide and filled with emotion as a choked sob escaped her throat, and she threw her arms around his neck, "I love you, too!" She cried against his shoulder, relishing in the private moment between one another.

His hands traced little patterns on her bare back, his mouth danced in soft kisses on her shoulder. "Vash?" her trembling voice entered his ears.

"Yes?"

"Please, Vash..." she mumbled into his ear, running her nails over his neck and into his hair.

He leaned closer to her, pushing her back onto the bed. He smiled down at her lovingly before melding his lips to hers.

~*~

Meryl awoke with the memory of last night still fresh in her mind. She blushed at all of the things she had said... all the things she had done! She simply couldn't believe some of the acts that went on in this very bed the night before.

Evidence that the night wasn't just a dream was curled up behind her, his arms both wrapped around her waist protectively. She glanced over at the small side table, at the items she had bought for their special night and wasn't very surprised that everything was empty, which brought another interesting thought to mind: the donut.

'Ugh! Did I actually do that!?' Meryl's mind cringed at the thought of what role the donut played last night. She swallowed a little to make sure and shuddered at the sweet, but bitter taste still left in her mouth, 'Oh God, I did...'

The covers shifted behind her and she felt Vash's hand work its way up to cup her breast. "Vash!" Meryl squeaked, pulling his 'naughty' hands away from her.

"Don't tell me you're still embarrassed after all you did last night," he yawned followed by a quick smirk.

The crimson poured back to Meryl's cheeks and she stuttered a little, "It was- I-"

"I'll never be able to look at a donut the same way again!" he said dreamily and pulled her back over to him, tickling her frenziedly.

"Vash!" Meryl laughed like mad and tried to squirm out of his grasp. "Let me go!"

He stopped and held her closer, "I love the way you laugh... You know, not the sadistic one, but the cheerful o-Oof!" Vash's eyes bugged out as Meryl's elbow connected with his stomach, "What was that for!?"

"I do not laugh sadistically!" Meryl sat up, pulling the covers around her chest.

"Ow, Meryl, that hurt..." he whimpered, sitting up halfway and exposing a good bit of his chest.

Meryl glanced over her shoulder, grinning a bit. She let the sheet drop with her left hand to snake her arm around his neck. "I'm sorry..." she pressed a wet kiss to his mouth. "All better?"

"Uh huh..." he pulled her over into his lap, smiling. "I'll give you anything you want if you just do that donut trick again..." he whispered into her ear seductively.

Meryl giggled, "Oh, really?"

"Mm-hm."

A sharp knock was heard at the door, startling both out of their conversation. "Meryl!" Millie could be heard on the other side of the door.

"Yes, Millie?" Meryl answered.

"It's Mr. Vash! He's not in his room!" Meryl shifted nervously.

"Really? Oh... ma-maybe he just went to the store or something?" Meryl's words rolled together followed by an awkward silence.

"...Oh!" Millie's giggle could be heard. "I'm sure he's just great then..."

Footsteps could be heard walking away from the door and Vash laughed quietly, "Think she knows?"

"Definitely..." Meryl laughed in return.