~ I waited for the dawn… ~
Meryl continued her walk with Milly, who was her usual ‘sunny-side-up’
self. Meryl thought of her rays of hope, but then the shadows of doubt
began to dim them. What if something terrible happened to Vash, and she
wasn’t there to help him? So many depressing questions now swirled through
the poor woman’s head… What if…what if he didn’t come back because he never
liked her anyways? A pang of depression struck.
They stood at their front doorstep. They house was nothing special, being
exactly like the ones next to it…except for the color, all the buildings in
the town were distinguished with different colors. Their residence was gray
– which perfectly described Meryl’s feelings at the moment. Milly opened
the door and peered over her shoulder, smiling at Meryl, “Come on Sempai,
I’ve already made breakfast!”
Her face dropped and an expression of her maternal worry took over, “What’s
the matter Sempai? Tell me.”
~…only broke down in tears… ~
Meryl shook her head; small orbs of tears flying from her face. She
attempted to rush past her working partner to get inside, but Milly only
barred her way, “I’m not budging until you tell me Sempai.”
“It’s…it’s nothing, really,” the crack in Meryl’s voice betrayed her words.
Milly’s face grew firm, but one look at Meryl’s face caused her to lighten
up, “Fine, we can go inside. But you are going to tell me during breakfast,
when you feel you can talk. Okay?”
Meryl nodded in affirmative, and smiled weakly; Milly is so persistent
sometimes!
The two friends ate their breakfast in silence, the only sounds being their
chewing of food and the cheerful chirping of the birds outside. Light
streamed through a window over the sink, giving the desired feeling of
being in a cathedral. Milly had insisted on decorating the kitchen for just
that reason. They kept the screen door in the back of the room opened, to
let the sweet scent of morning come in.
After much reading of Meryl’s face, Milly broke the silence, “Does it have
anything to do with Mr. Vash?”
Meryl tensed at the mention of his name, but loosened and nodded.
“Don’t worry about him Sempai! Mr. Vash can get through anything!”
“Yeah…” Meryl stared absent-mindedly out the kitchen window; the sky had
turned into a modest baby blue now. Vash always had an odd habit of getting
out of every situation presented to him, even if most of his escapes
weren’t exactly graceful.
~ You don’t know how much I miss you… ~
Meryl dismissed herself from the table for her own room. It wasn’t really
anything to boast about, but was a very comfortable size – not too big and
not too small. She flopped onto her bed, the sheets cold. Meryl lay there
for quite a while, staring at the ceiling, closing her eyes to try and
picture his face again… Pretty thin and kind of lanky, aqua green eyes that
had always kept her a sure captive, unruly blonde hair…in fact, his hair is
what really describes his personality – different, sort of silly, crazy…but
that’s most of what makes him so loveable!
Turning to her nightstand, Meryl spotted a photo – it was of Wolfwood,
Vash, Milly, and her sitting together at some bar or something. The memory
made her grin; she was frantically trying to stop a drunken Milly from
taking her shirt off, Vash was nearly falling out of his chair egging her
on, and Wolfwood blushing with a ridiculous grin on his face. A bartender
took it because they were so loud, and decided to make the moment
memorable…and it was too. It only took one look at Vash’s smiling face to
melt her though, and she pondered about how much she missed him. She missed
him so much her heart burned in agony.
~…but now you’ll never know… ~
He won’t return.
That little sadistic part of her mind kept repeating that. Meryl held her
hands to cover her face – what should I believe? Like many other times, she
cursed her thoughts for never agreeing with each other.
He’s not coming back.
It’s so persistent! It just simply has to go and ruin a completely
beautiful morning by stomping all over those rays of hope, those feeble
rays that Meryl hung on to for dear life. So desperately.
Oh, so many times there was when she could have confessed her affection.
But no – right when she was able to muster enough courage to initiate a
passionate conversation with the man, either he’d say something that would
trigger her normal ‘irritated-workaholic’ mode or someone else would come
in and they wouldn’t be alone anymore.
Then there was that absolute perfect time, the time before Vash had left
and was telling Meryl of his past. (Upon her insistence of course.) But no,
she just had to lose her gut right when the word ‘I’ tumbled off of her
tongue. She was sure that someone out there was entertaining themself right
now by putting her into such misery. But then…
~ I waited for the dawn,
only broke down into tears.
You don’t know how much I miss you,
But now you’ll never know… ~
…maybe, just maybe…this wasn’t meant to be.
