The Third Moment

She was going to die.

If the boredom didn’t get to her, his stubbornness would.

Today he had been more adamantly silent than usual, not bothering to answer anything she asked him. She was getting somewhat annoyed.

She didn’t understand at all. He had been growing much better; she hardly had to support him on the way to the bathroom anymore. But she didn’t feel as if these past few weeks had accomplished anything.

That, and her time was limited.

Three weeks, and then they were gone.

She folded her arms over her chest, feeling smaller than usual. If Knives showed no restraint in his dealings with humans, then how would Vash take care of him? Would he learn to behave in society?

And if he didn’t… what would she do about it?

She could kill him. It seemed easy enough, but then again, he wasn’t human. Maybe he really could dodge if she stuck a derringer to his temple and fired. It seemed unlikely.

Could she do it? Could she kill someone with the eyes of the man she loved?

Would she? It would drive Vash completely away from her. Maybe Milly as well. She wasn’t a killer.

But… could she let humanity be ravaged by a man like this?

No, not even a man. A plant. Humanity’s own creation rebelling against them.

It was an unfair decision to have to make. But maybe… maybe, he would learn…

“Water,” he demanded suddenly, voice dark.

Maybe not.

She stood slowly, watching him gaze at the ceiling. “Water and?”

Irritation. “Water please,” he said gruffly, not moving his eyes.

She nodded and went to get it from the kitchen.

As she filled the cup idly from the faucet, another thought crossed her mind. What if she just didn’t go home?

Orders were orders, but she could always quit. She could earn a living here, give in her notice by mail. It could work. It could work. She could stay with Vash.

And leave Milly.

Milly certainly wouldn’t want to quit. She loved her job. She missed her family very much and wanted to go back to them. She would return to December no matter what.

So it was her best friend or the man she loved.

She suddenly noticed that the water was overfilling the cup and spilling onto her fingers over the sides. Quickly she turned off the faucet and started meandering back to the bedroom.

No, this choice wasn’t hard. She could go with her best friend that she cared for very much, and who cared for her as well. Or she could stay with a man who simply tolerated her and nothing more.

Or was there something?

The door she pushed open with a gentle hand to find Knives gazing at her, brows lowered, but not in anger. She sat down and handed him the glass, curious, yet unafraid. He took it silently, raised himself slightly with his free hand, and took a sip. “Thank you.”

Hm, without any prompting. Maybe he really was learning.

“Did you need anything else?” she asked, her voice quiet in the stillness of the house. His eyes were still focused on her, penetrating her, seeing through her.

“No, I’m fine.” He set the glass down on the small table beside his bed.

“All right, I’m going to go cut the rest of the fabric for your brother’s pants in the other room. Call me if you need anything, all right?” She rose in order to leave, but something in his eyes stayed her for a moment.

“Meryl.” His voice was gentle, almost like Vash’s but for the slightly deeper pitch. She shivered.

“Yes?” It was slightly unreal.

He seemed about to say something, but then stopped, a dark look coming over his eyes, then leaned back down. His gaze turned away.

“Knives-san?” Had she done something wrong? Had she offended him, perhaps?

He didn’t reply, but she sat down again, determined to say something to fix this. She took a deep breath, trying to relax. She could do this.

“You know, when you were younger you must have been a really adorable kid,” she started, feeling shy and foolish. Where was she planning on going with this? “I bet you and Vash-san got into all sorts of trouble together.” She paused, smiling in spite of herself. What would Vash have been like as a child? But no, she was speaking to Knives. She had to give him her attention now. “You must have been very studious, weren’t you? Somehow I see you studying philosophy while Vash-san would scarf whatever food was in front of him.” Again she smiled, content.

“I was very studious too when I was younger,” she murmured. “I always did all of my homework and did the best on the tests. I think it was because I wanted the praise for being the smartest, the best. I was always so small, so I got picked on a lot, and I didn’t have any big brothers or sisters to take care of me the way Milly did…” She paused, looking down at her hands. “I didn’t cry, because that would have been weak. It would have meant I didn’t have control over the situation. I knew I really didn't, but I wanted that pretense. It made me feel safer.

“I think you must have been a lot like me,” she continued, not looking towards him at all. “It’s frustrating to be picked on and the littlest, so when you can do something, you do it the best you can so you won’t be at the bottom of the heap anymore.

“But he was more delicate than you, wasn’t he?” she continued, almost to herself now, then stopped. “No, he wasn’t more delicate,” she amended. “He turns things outside and cries, but you… you must have turned them inside.” A slow breath. “It was just that you wouldn’t show it. It must have been hard…”

Now she dared to raise her eyes. He was still looking away from her, toward the wall, but she felt somehow that he had heard every word she had spoken. She stood slowly, hesitantly, with a soft swish of cloth. “Knives-san, if you need me, I’ll be in the other room.”

He did not look towards her even as she exited.